Dynamite

Tio Cruz is famous for singing "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes, saying 'Aaaayo! Gotta let goooo!'"

Well, in high school my friends and I used the paraphrase:
"I throw my homework in the air sometimes, saying 'Aaayo! I'll take a Zerooo!"

We thought we were clever.

But tonight, I realized my little rhyme doesn't work so well in Adult World.

During the middle of one of my new "adult things" I began to get pretty frustrated. As I used to do in high school, I began to sing, "I throw my..." But then I realized it wasn't homework. And I couldn't just "take a zero".

Because it's not part of a grade anymore, it's actually my work performance. And it matters.

Not that my homework never mattered to me, on the contrary, I always tried to get it done. But those nights when I'd spent 3 hours on an AP History worksheet, towards the end I admit I would put down blow off answers. My grade was padded enough, who cared if I got it wrong? I'd just make up for it later.

But now, I can't get things wrong.*

It's a whole different concept, knowing that I can't just shrug things off anymore. No longer does crossing my fingers and hoping for extra credit work. Because this is the real world. And they want real work.

I think the problem with society today is that only about half of adults get this- the other half are stuck in the close-one-eye-make-a-wish-on-a-dandelion mode. And that's not beneficial. For anyone. (Excluding dandelions, who seem to be multiplying by the second.)

This is my newest challenge (or warning) to all: Learn  the difference between the real adults and the dandelion ones. And then, put your trust in the smart ones. Because while dandelions might be fun to be around, they aren't someone you can trust with advice, money, relationships, jobs, commitment, anything that will affect your future.

Leave the presence of a fool, for there you do not meet words of knowledge. The wisdom of the prudent is to discern his way, but the folly of fools is deceiving.- Proverbs 14:7-8, I believe.

Prudent. Yuck. I thought that was the worst word growing up. It sounds like a mix between the words "prune" and "dent", and there is nothing glamorous about any part of that.

So needless to say, the thought of striving to be someone people would call "prudent" never exactly thrilled me.

But as there is to everything, we have a flip side. Here is a beautiful quote I read a few years ago, that has become one of my biggest philosophy.

"Follow your heart, but take your brain with you."

I was talking to my friend Kristi last week, and we came to the exact same conclusion.

God gives us desires. He gives us dreams. It's what makes us who we are and gives us the special ability to work in places only we can. My friend Christina is an awesome Clarinet player. She's so good, she marched in the Rose Parade this year, and might possibly be touring around Eurpoe this coming summer. God's given her a passion for music, and she has this huge realm of musicians she can witness to. Me? Not so much. Once we move past the fact there's a treble and a bass clef, I'm lost.

But that's not who God made me to witness to. He hasn't given me the same passion as her, or you, or anyone else.

So the exciting thing is, it's good to follow our Godly desires.
The scary thing is, if we don't use wisdom, we can end up really, REALLY lost.

When God offered King Solomon anything, and Solomon chose wisdom, God was thrilled. I think, after love, wisdom is one of God's favorite things.

If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him (James 1:5)

We need to remember, that while we're living out life, pursuing our dreams; we have to remember to continually ask God for wisdom- and act on it.
Be someone after God's own heart- and take His wisdom with you.

And now, if you'll excuse me, I need to get to bed. Because while writing is a lot more fun than sleeping, I need to be up early tomorrow. Call me prudent, but I think sleep is the wise thing to do. (-:

Live without pretense. Love. Drink more water.
A.Diez



*Okay I CAN, but it wouldn't be without major issues occurring. Obviously I'm human so I'm going to make some mistakes.

If you're heart is red and black, don't wear yellow and blue

Okay, so I know in my last blog, I said my next blog would be a sort of continuation of "Highschool Wasn't Heaven". But I'm going to have to pause on that. Because today, I am wearing my favorite shirt. And I want to write about it.

This shirt is perfect. The long sleeves make me feel cozy, it's light enough for me to breathe in, and the quality is really, really good. It's not one of my hipster shirts, but I wear it almost as often. This shirt is good for soccer games in the fall, early morning runs, summer night adventures, even just bumming around the best friend's house. It's a darn good pajama shirt too.

But everyone else hates my shirt. For one little, tiny reason.

It's the shirt of my high school's rivals.

I'm not one to give into peer pressure, this is my favorite shirt so I wear it when I want. But I remember one incident, last spring, where my stubbornness went just a little too far.
We were at Borgia high school (the Alma mater of my favorite shirt!) for a track meet. I guess it's kind of a thing to wear your own school colors when you're competing, but I didn't have any long sleeve Union shirts. Is it my fault we always order T-Shirts instead of sweatshirts? No.

I guess I didn't think about how odd that must have looked in the stands, for Union's section:

Union Hoddie. Union T-Shirt. Union Hoddie. Union Jacket Union T-Shirt. Union Jacket. Union Hoddie. Union T-Shirt. BORGIA Shirt. Union Hoodie. Union Jacket.Union Hoodie. Union Hoddie. Union T-Shirt.  Union Hoodie. Union Jacket. Union Hoddie. Union T-Shirt.

Maybe it would have been different if we weren't competing against them that day, or if I'd worn a Union T-Shirt over it. But I remember, me wearing my Borgia shirt became quite the controversy. One mom came up and asked if she found a long sleeve Union shirt for me, would I wear it. She explained, "I don't want other people thinking you're from Borgia. Union wants to claim you!"

That was the sweetest thing I'd ever heard. At least that day, while I'd been wearing that shirt.

And this is about the time, where I slip in my Jesus-analogy. GET EXCITED!

Sometimes I think as Christians, we wear the wrong shirt.

I mean, we are Christians. We accept Jesus into our hearts, and want to follow him through and through. But as far as representing Him, well I know I've done my fair share of failing.

What about us shows people we follow Jesus, completely sold out. Anything?

And the weird thing is, just like Union wanted to claim me, God wants to claim us too. He wants to be like "That girl? With the crazy good art skills and ability to knit? Yeah, I made her! She follows me!"

But God is a gentleman. Jesus purchased the shirt for us when he gave up His life on the cross. He's put it in a gift bag and handed it to us. But He's not going to shove our arms up and push the shirt onto us. That's something we need to do because we love Him.

Something I noticed at that meet was, wearing my Borgia shirt, I didn't really fit in anywhere. Obviously I stuck out like a sore thumb with Union. But when I passed by the Borgia section, I got some stares too. Because I wasn't a Borgian, I was a Unionite.

If we're Christians, we need to accept here and now that we aren't going to fit in with the world, we weren't made for it, so why should we look like it? But we aren't going to be doing Christ much good if we don't represent Him either.

So there you have it. Tomorrow morning, choose your outfit wisely.

Live without pretense. Love. Drink more water.
A.Diez

Highschool wasn't Heaven.

"Good morning UHS, this is Alonnah," "And Anna with your morning announcements."

I loved high school. During the 3 1/2 years I spent in that building, I made so many friends, with students and staff and teachers and visitors. I poured my heart out into that place.
3 Years of Track. 2 for Cross Country. 2 in Student Council. 2 School Plays (one on crew my Freshman year, and one on stage as a Senior.) I was in FCA, Drama Club, Varsity Club. I'd stayed after school to paint the walls, run with friends, lift weights, sometimes even just to hang out with those staying after for a different activity. Some days, I'd be at school for 16 hours. Like I said, that place had my heart.

And in December, I graduated.
I've been busy. I've always been. My main things are my new internship and finding a job. But I also spend lots of time at church, with family, friends, learning guitar, writing a blog, ect.
Never a dull moment.

But even with me being busy, January has been hard on me. Because I've missed school. The more I think about it, I poured out so much into something that was over so quick. All those years of track, and I'll never run another race for UHS again. So many early morning Stu Co meetings, and now I won't be going to them. After trying so hard to get people to come to FCA, I won't even be there anymore. No more Drama Club, Cross Country, School Plays. None of it. Because high school is over.

Now please don't think I'm saying everything I did was a waste of time. I'm glad I was so involved, I've made friendships that were golden, and I've learned a lot of different things. But, I wish I would've been more aware of the fact that high school is just 4 years. I didn't seem to think past my high school bubble. I was caught up in the moment of Homecoming, and Courtwarming, and track season, and Prom. And those weren't bad things, but they also weren't everything.

The more I've talked with others about this, the more I realize an almost scary analogy. Being in high school, putting so much into building my high school career, and then suddenly not going anymore.
It reminds me of earth and heaven.

Here we are on Earth. Doing earthy things- getting a job, buying a house, establishing a career, going on cool vacations, enjoying our usual TV show, eating at our favorite restaurant. None of those are BAD things. But they are EARTH things. And we need to remind ourselves that once we get to heaven, these things will have no meaning to us. Whatsoever.

I promise, once we are in the presence of God, we won't be thinking about the Christmas bonus we never got.

I feel like this frees us up a bit too. The feeling we get after we trade in our sweet ride for something a little more humbling due to finances, that won't hurt so much. Because it's just your earth ride. The huge zit on your face, that's not even going to be remembered in heaven. I'm reminded of the song "You Hold Me Now" where it talks about all the things heaven isn't going to have -weeping, hurt, pain, suffering. It's going to be so much better than earth.

But I'll talk about that in my next post.

For now live without pretense. Love. Drink more water. Remember earth is temporary.
A.Diez.

And on the seventh day, she made perfection.

A few firsts I hate.
-First job.
-First time I cut my leg shaving.
-First break-up.
-First impressions. With anyone.
-First cavity.
-First time I tried a Pinterest idea.
-First foundation I bought.
-First time I got gas for my car.
-First track race I ran.
-First day of first grade.
-First time I got pulled over.

It's safe to say, I'm not big on firsts. In fact, some days I wish we could just skip "Hello" and go right into what we're going to say to the person. Introduction is not my strong suite. I just feel like there's so much pressure. Because you only get a first time once.

I recently had my first day at a new internship. I love the internship, and I'm so excited to dive into everything, but I hate first days, in general. I tend to get a little awkward, and feel ill at ease. My friend explained to a few people, "She's just nervous. It's her first day."

I wish we could have first weeks. Then I feel like I'd have enough time to improve. "It's my first week. Sorry I botched up your order." Or, "Please remind me your name!" "Don't worry, it's your first week!"

The reason we, at least I do, need first weeks, is because we mess up. Constantly. I'm not trying to be all pessimistic here, I'm just pointing our we're human. Which bring me to the end of my rambling- my main point.

Almost.

Rewind time.

Junior year.
Most of you probably aren't aware, but Junior year did not start off good for me. To keep it simple, many people I looked up to started making very poor decisions. I lost a lot of those I loved and admired, due to human stupidity and selfishness.

And I started doubting God.

Now, I did a lot of searching, and if you want to hear more about that you'll have to Facebook me. But tonight I want to focus on one conversation, one point, that was brought up to me during this.

Hey, Dad.

We were in my dad's den. I believe I was sitting on the floor crying and he was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room. I told him I was having issues trusting God. It seemed like any time someone was a Christian or became a Christian in my life, it turned into pretense. It wouldn't last, or they gave up, or they really weren't passionate about it at all. And here are the words of Daddy Diez. (The way I remember them, again, the quotation marks technically probably shouldn't be there.)

"I'm sorry all this is happening to you, you've had a lot of people let you down. And that's hard. But that's not God's fault- that's theirs. And your relationship with God should be based on Him, not on your friends or boyfriends or family or anyone. People will let you down. I'll try not to, and I'm sorry if I do, but I might end up letting you down as well. But you're faith shouldn't be in people, it should be in God."

This concept didn't take me too long to catch on to. But tonight I realized something. Visa versa time! When people do awesome things, we can't forget to thank God. For guiding them, putting them in our lives, letting us experience the repurcussions of their awesomeness.

 

And how do we become awesome? Well, you are who you hang out with. And God is awesome and interesting and so dang cool, that I think if we focus on him it'll kinda seep out of us. In a cool way. Not in a syrup from a tree way. But that's cool too. I like pancakes.

In all seriousness, God is good. I never want to let the people around me change my idea of Him, because that is them being human. And God isn't human. That's why He's God. It sounds so simple, but I think we are guilty of so many times blaming God for what others do.
NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTION TIME!!! :D
Start giving God credit where it's do. Stop blaming him for other's mistakes. Spend more time with Him so we can have godly awesomeness pour out of our pores.

Finished! Have a good first week at whatever you're doing.

Live without pretense. Love. Drink more water.
-A.Diez